Choose one of the ideas below and you’ll see better anger manager
1. Put angry, abusive words kids say in the Anger Bag (paper bag) and
have them wrinkle the bag every time they put a hurtful word inside. Kids can smooth out the Anger Bag with kind words. I would make a list of kind words that they need to practice. Develop a habit of burying the bag to communicate the words don’t belong on our island even though they may be used in other places. Put these words on an attitude umbrella similar to the one I share in my seminars.
2. Work with the entire class to generate a list of words that express
strong feelings that are acceptable and post them on a chart. Use a bean
bag to toss to the class . They have to state one of the ideas on the
chart before they catch the bean bag. Make this a daily game to
practice appropriate ways to express strong feelings.
3.Use a miniature “Winnie the Pooh” bean bag and brainstorm “Winnie
the Pooh, what would he do?” when faced with a similar problem they
encounter. I would recommend saying only 2 alternatives that Winnie would do to be
kind to all his friends in the Hundred Acre Woods. Play a game so when
you throw the bean bag to different members of the class they have to
cite one of the two options before they throw the bag back to you.
4.Let angry kids and the entire class know “Kids with high self esteem
don’t put other kids down.” So if you hear a person put somebody down
it’s a clue they are in trouble or don’t feel good about themsel
Reminder- the best time to teach and model alternatives to targeted
anger is not when a child is angry. Always better to postpone the
learning to another time. It’s equally important to teach the child to
target the anger downward not at others.
5. Teach kids with short fuses this saying “Hurt Kids Hurt Kids”. If the
child was of preschool age I would teach him this concept by telling a
story with animals about a kangaroo that always hurt other kangaroos and ask
what could the class do. I’d invite the entire class in on this lesson.
6.You can hold a child’s hand firmly and walk briskly around the room
and let him know those kind of words really make me angry. Then I would
say I walk fast so I will restrain myself from getting angry. I would
walk fast with him holding my hand. Kids really appreciate when you
stop not getting angry at them. It’s critical you do not personalize their anger even when it’s directed at you.
7. Bottom line is angry children need a lot of love. He’s really
hurting! The tendency with hurt angry kids is for us to try to solve the
problem by hurting and being angry back. Anger is like wet paint; it
rubs off on everyone.
8. If you hurt someone you have to heal someone with 2 compliments. I
wouldn’t force this but would want him to see that he’s capable of being
nice and reinforce his thoughtful acts and deeds. Teach kids the four
steps of remorse and other forgiving strategies when they do hurt
9. Get a piece of sandpaper and a piece of velvet. Show him how words
can be abrupt and abrasive by rubbing the sandpaper on back of the child’s
hand. Then show how they can be smooth like velvet when they are kind and
compassionate. Be careful not to use the sandpaper too much as it might
cause a wound.
10 Say what you mean and mean what you say but don’ t be mean when you
say it! Teaching kids not only to use their words but also how to be
patient is an everyday function of classrooms and homes.