Whited School Santa Rosa CA September 19,2010
Responsibility Management for Parents The 5 Ps of Raising Responsible Kids September 19, 2010 Gene Bedley’s parent seminar The 5 Ps of Raising Responsible Kids presented for parents at Whited School Santa Rosa on September 19, 2003 addressed the topics of Developing a clear Philosophy, Proven Perdictions, Powerful Proverbs, Problem Solving strategies, and a Program that delivers results.
From the begining of the seminar and throughout the seminar the audience saw and heard one truth axiom after another. ” Every parent needs a Table to place their Puzzle on” When it comes to disciplining children it’s important to remember that “Discipline is like a bridled horse with the reins held lightly” He further described discipline similar to “holding a wet bar of soap If you squeeze it too hard it will propel itself away. If you hold it too lightly it will fall away But if you grasp it firm enough it will serve the purpose for which it was designed”
It’s so important to create an environment of Fairness but warned that Fairness is not giving every child the same thing rather meeting kids individual needs. Kids understand this if you use doctor appointments as an example. Just because one child needs a shot doesn’t mean we give shots to every kid in the family. The PTA National Educator of the Year addressed the importance of using character traits as reference points for all discipline.”Discipline without reference points is like a dictionary without guide words.” He described the difference between responsibility and control. “Do you want your kids to exclusively obey you or do you want them to be responsible? “Most parents want both but can miss responsibility by heavy control demands. He further challenged parents not to bail their kids out when they made poor choices. One of the most important things we can do is to help kids see that we all make good choice as well bad choices and we need to experience the results of making poor choices as well remember “we work more miracles than disasters”.
Gene stressed the importance of being a role model of calmness, positive encourager, separating the compliance issues from those that are negotiable . “Kids can aways walk around trouble if there is someplace to walk to and someone to walk with.” ” The more you love your kids the higher expectations you can place on your kids”
He Challenged parents to set up a place to solve problems as well develop consistency in the problem solving process. “Out of our anger comes punishment Out of our need to raise responsible kids comes problem solving” Gene reviewed the steps for problem solving. They include:
What Happened (clarify what the problem is together) How are you going to fix it? (Place responsibility on child to solve) Where do you think you will start( Kids need a first step to get started) What Happens if you don’t keep your agreement? ( Always a need for contingency plans when designing a plan)
Gene Reminded parents “The difference that makes a difference is not Heredity, Circumstances, Disability, Discrimination, or Environment it’s kids who overcome obstacles that will succeed.” There’s nothing more important than helping our kids learn how to persevere and teaching our kids how to transend the obstacles they will face in their lives. “If we can anticipate the things we might encounter we are better able to deal with them when we encounter them”
Throughout the seminar Gene provided parents with strategies and solutions in cultivating responsible children from the “Responsibility Microphone” to the “Attitude Umbrella” he reminded parents that “Kids need reminders more than they need to be informed.”
Parent Comments from the seminar included:
“The seminar was terrific”
To be honest I was reluctant to go to another parent seminar but found Gene’s talk full of hope and practical ideas I can use immediately.
I really liked Genes comments about the way we define our kids determines our interventions.
“I ‘d attend any Gene Bedley’s seminars in the future”
Really appreciate the PTA sponsoring such a quality parent program You can learn more about Gene Bedley Seminars and Books and Materials at www.ethicsusa.com A video tape titled The 5 Ps of Raising Responsible Children is available at the website