Did You Cut Down That Cherry Tree?
Focus on the number of times the child tells the truth rather than the lies they tell. It s important to elevate kids to a responsible level not to focus on their shortcomings. If you have a chronic liar, you might need to use a more extreme measure. Remember, lying is a trust breaker. It means that I can not tell when you are lying and when you are telling the truth.
What would happen if you lied to the children? Suppose that for an entire day you made promises to them. Then you only made excuses when they reminded you of your agreements. Sometimes the only way children can learn a lesson is to over saturate them with what they are doing in order for them to learn the concept. The real learning comes at the end of the day when you summarize your decisions, and begin to teach the children cause and effect.
If an incident requires retribution, it s important to train your children correct responses. It s important to separate saying you are sorry with asking for forgiveness. Saying you are sorry is for accidental mistakes, and asking for forgiveness is when you do something mean on purpose.
It is equally important to teach your children the steps in showing remorse. Some of these are listed below.
1. Walk over to the person.
2. Looking down, say in a quiet voice. “I’m sorry.” If you did something on purpose, you are also required to ask forgiveness.
3. Asking for forgiveness means you are not going to do it again.
Never force children to say that they are sorry. If you do, the children s response will usually fall short of a remorseful attitude.
– Gene Bedley