The Pitfalls of Praise & Punishment
In an effort to have kids comply with various kinds of behavior expectations, we resort to either praise or punishment without really exploring the long-range consequences or to explore other alternatives in promoting positive behavior. With so many oppositional personalities to influence it doesn’t take long to recognize that neither of these alternatives are viable.
If all we do is praise kids they tend to negate it over a period of time. This ultimately leads toward turning adults off or building a dependency on the praise in order to accomplish the next behavioral goal. We’ve all heard the statement “What do I get?”. The research proves that if teachers build in intrinsic messages along with external reinforcement the child at least derives the satisfaction that they are responsible and can be counted upon.
The more we learn about punishment as a deterrent to inappropriate behavior it becomes clear that those who get punished lay the blame on those who place them in the penalty box, rather than accept responsibility for their actions.
One alternative that I have developed in Responsibility Management (The Big “R” Responsibility