No Rules, No Game

Demand to be right creates a fight!

To belittle others is to be little!

It’s okay to make a mistake, that the way we learn!

Kids with high self-esteem don’t put others down!

Lose and laugh law — when you lose a game, try laughing!

Find a way — No excuses!

If you can’t admit you’re wrong, you’ll never get along!

Work it out with words!

If someone can get your goat, you have a goat to get!

Keep smiling, anything that can make you and keep you angry conquers you!

(C) Gene Bedley 1985

TEACH THESE PREVENTIVE CONFLICT RULES TO EVERYONE IN YOUR CLASS. REQUIRE

THEM TO MEMORIZE THEM. USE THESE RULES EVERY TIME ONE OF YOUR CHILDREN HAVE A

PROBLEM. YOU’LL FIND STUDENTS TAKING MORE RESPONSIBILITY AND BETTER PREPARED

TO FACE THE PROBLEMS THEY ENCOUNTER.

RULES TO RELATE

1. THE DEMAND TO BE RIGHT COULD CREATE A FIGHT!

TRY AGREEING WITH THE OTHER PERSON’S IDEAS ONCE IN A WHILE. EVERYONE HAS

GOOD IDEAS THAT MIGHT BE JUST WHAT’S NEEDED TO MAKE THINGS WORK BETTER. THIS

DOES NOT MEAN COMPROMISING YOUR CORE VALUES (FAMILY BELIEFS.) THE GOAL IS TO

LESSEN THE NEED TO ALWAYS DO THINGS YOUR OWN WAY. WHEN YOU SUPPORT ANOTHER

PERSON’S IDEASecondary Schools, IT MAKES THEM FEEL GOOD ABOUT THEM SELF AND ABOUT YOU!

2. WHEN IT COMES TO PROBLEMS, I NEED TO REMEMBER TO WORK IT OUT WITH KIND

WORDS!

WITH THE INCREASE OF VIOLENCE AND ABUSE IN THE WORLD, IT’S IMPORTANT TO MAKE

EVERY EFFORT TO RESOLVE DIFFERENCES WITH OTHERS BY TALKING IT OVER. LET’S

WORK TOGETHER TO CREATE “AN ISLAND OF PEACE IN A WORLD OF CONFLICT.”

3. IT’S O.K. TO MAKE A MISTAKE, THAT’S THE WAY WE LEARN!

MISTAKES MAY BE REMEMBERED EVEN MORE THAN SUCCESSES. ITS IMPORTANT TO ACCEPT

OTHERS’ MISTAKES AS WELL AS OUR OWN MISTAKES. MISTAKES CAN BE A GREAT WAY TO

LEARN AND TO IMPROVE. IT’S LIKE FILM PRODUCTIONS THAT REQUIRE SEVERAL “TAKES”

BEFORE THE RIGHT PICTURE IS TAKEN TO COMPLETE THE MOVIE.

4. KIDS WITH HIGH SELF-ESTEEM DON’T PUT OTHER PEOPLE DOWN!

WHEN SOMEBODY CALLS YOU A NAME, OR TRIES TO MAKE YOU FEEL BAD, REMEMBER THAT

THEY PROBABLY HAVE POOR SELF-ESTEEM. USUALLY KIDS WHO ARE IN TROUBLE WORK

HARD TO MAKE OTHERS FEEL BAD!

5. IF YOU LOSE A GAME, TRY LAUGHING!

(THE LOSE & LAUGH LAW)

THERE ARE A LOT OF CHOICES IN LIFE WHEN GOALS ARE NOT ACHIEVED. FOR EXAMPLE,

TRY LAUGHING WHEN YOU MESS UP IN A GAME, THEN GET BACK IN LINE WITH NEW

DETERMINATION TO PLAY EVEN HARDER THE NEXT TIME. LAUGHING CAN GIVE YOU ENERGY.

6. WHENEVER YOU’RE FACED WITH A PROBLEM, LOOK FOR CREATIVE WAYS TO SOLVE THE

PROBLEM! FIND A WAY, NOT EXCUSES.

PEOPLE WHO ARE SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE CONTINUALLY FIND CREATIVE SOLUTIONS TO THE

PROBLEMS THEY FACE, WHILE OTHERS MAKE EXCUSES.

7. BEFORE YOU PLAY A GAME WITH SOMEONE, MAKE SURE YOU GO OVER THE RULES. NO

RULES, NO GAME!

RULES MADE UP BEFORE PLAYING A GAME WORK BETTER FOR EVERYONE PLAYING THAT

GAME. RULES MADE UP DURING THE GAME, DESTROYS THE GAME AND CAUSES ARGUMENTS!

WHEN IN DOUBT, FOLLOW THE SCHOOL RULES.

8. IF SOMEBODY CAN GET YOUR GOAT, YOU HAVE A GOAT TO GET.

WHEN PEOPLE KNOW THEY CAN MAKE YOU MAD, THEN THEY WILL TRY TO MAKE YOU MAD.

PEOPLE LOVE TO SEE OTHERS GET UPSET AND DO WEIRD THINGS. IF PEOPLE CAN’T GET

YOUR GOAT (MAKE YOU MAD), THEN THEY WILL GIVE UP! A GOOD IDEA IS TO GET RID

OF ALL YOUR “GOATS!” ANYTHING THAT KIDS MAKE FUN OF IS A GOAT!

9. WHEN SETTLING A PROBLEM REMEMBER, IT’S NOT WHO’S RIGHT BUT WHAT’S RIGHT. IT

SHOWS YOU ARE MORE MATURE WHEN YOU TAKE THE LEADERSHIP AND TRY TO SOLVE THE

PROBLEM RATHER THAN FIND FAULT WITH EVERYONE ELSE.

10. IF YOU CAN’T ADMIT YOU’RE WRONG, YOU’LL NEVER GET ALONG! EVERYONE HAS

FLAWS. BECOME A PERSON WHO DISCLOSES THEIR WEAKNESSES AS WELL AS CELEBRATING

YOUR STRENGTHS. YOU ARE NOT O.K. AND I’M NOT O.K. AND THAT’S O.K.

11. TO BELITTLE OTHERS IS TO BE LITTLE- BE A BIG PERSON! IF YOU CAN’T SAY

ANYTHING NICE ABOUT A PERSON DON’T SAY ANYTHING.

(C) GENE BEDLEY 1993

– Gene Bedley